The time has come. Lock your doors and windows. Run up your credit cards. Eat dessert and if you've ever thought of having a threesome now would be the time, because the end of the world is upon us. I have a date on Friday, which is why I'm sure the remaining horsemen of the apocalypse will be along shortly.
This date with Tyler almost didn't happen, mostly because of my incredible ability to read between the lines. Incredible in this case meaning, "not at all, or even a little bit." For example, our first attempt to set up a meeting went south because Tyler is moving apartments. This is what was said:
Bambi: What's your week looking like?
Tyler: Oh man, I've got three days to pack all my stuff so this week isn't looking good. Next week would probably be better.
This is what I actually read:
Bambi: What's your week looking like?
Tyler: Please go away. I am officially blowing you off, and I would like nothing more to do with you. In fact, thanks to you, I am now gay -- not that there's anything wrong with that. I am a proud gay man, and you made me that way. I don't want to meet you. I don't want to talk to you and if you'll excuse me, I'll be dancing to the Scissor Sisters. Now fark off.
What can I say? I can't be right all of the time. His moving date got changed, and now we're on for Friday. I have no idea what to wear, what to do or how much self-tanner it's going to take for my legs to not be blue.
This will be our first time laying eyes on each other, so surely...what could possibly go wrong?
1 comment:
I vote for a cute skirt. Nothing too short, but something that can be worn with a funky pair of shoes. Of course, your Prada bag, which will give you couture strenght, and a top that shows some cleavage, but doesn't invite him to sit down to eat.
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